Thursday, May 25, 2006
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Does it come from losing weight? Hopefully not, although it is a good thing to be healthy and take care of the temple that God has bought!
Does it come from watching TV. I would hope not, but when have I ever been so excited about reading the Word and spend three hours a night reading it - or recording it when I have to miss it and pouring over it -skipping the commercials - when I can watch it?
Does it come from a boring job? Well, definitely not this one. Even getting paid more - it doesn't matter...my 40 hours a week is not going to fulfill me - no matter what job I have?
Does it come from my ministry? Well, even though it is the reason I am in the state - it isn't. You would think that - every summer I go through this...why am I here? My ministry pretty much comes to a complete stop for 3 1/2 mths and I wonder what in the world am I doing here?
Does it come from material things? Definitely not - especially when you are still unpacking things from when you moved in (3mths ago).
Does it come from a relationship - any relationship. Nope - my life is pretty slim on those right now, and I actually like it. I let others do the talking and I just sorta listen - and I'm good with it. I hope no one thinks anything bad because I don't talk a lot... Then when it comes to guys...are expectations really that high? Don't lower them - but are they realistic. Don't know...
Where is the truth and desire of Ps 27.4 and Ps 63 in my life these days? Christian Hedonism - John PIper and Jonathan Edwards...finding joy in God because it will bring us the most joy because only God can fulfill all of our everythings with Himself. That is not me right now...
Oh pray that it is: pray the desire returns...
Monday, May 15, 2006
Thank you Mom - my biggest fan!
Thursday, May 11, 2006
So...in high school, I don't really remember what I did when I had a bad day. Probably yell at my parents or something. But I remember trying to be what everyone else thought I should be in high school - so pleasing everyone made for an easy life back then.
College...Flagler (you know the beach has got to play in this somewhere). I did three things in college to remedy a bad day: walk the beach at night by myself for about 2 hours, sit in front of Phyllis' fireplace with a fake log crackling, sipping tea and rocking in a rocking chair. Last, on really bad weeks, I would just get in my car on a Friday night or Saturday morning and drive to Lakeland to do nothing. That 2 hour drive myself with music playing or no noise at all was a great remedy.
Seminary...usually on bad days Sarah and I would go walk from the campus to Flaherty - that usually happened about midnight. I had a room to myself except the first 1 1/2 semesters, so I would just lay on my bed and not answer my door. You can always be really really quiet and no one will bother you - oh how nice that is. Once Sarah left I had to settle for sitting out on the seminary lawn by myself. As long as you are not sitting in ants you are doing pretty good - especially fall or early spring on a warm day when the sun was out.
Now...what am I to do in Durham??? There is no quiet place to walk that is safe. There are no lakes or beaches within walking distance. I like walking UNC but you can't really do that at night by yourself. So...remedies for bad days in Durham...
1. Drive to St. Augustine - when gas prices are down and I have nothing to do that weekend (boy, these are rare days).
2. Sit in the apt (or my room) and have it quiet or play a favorite movie: Sweet Home Alabama, Anne of Green Gables (playing now), Patriot, Italian Job, Count of Monte Cristo, Pirates of the Caribbean, Its a Wonderful Life, Beautiful Mind, Indiana Jones, American President, Catch Me If You Can, You've Got Mail, Just to name a few...
3. The best one I can think of...SIT in the hard spray of a hot shower. Too bad water isn't included in the rent in this apt. Most of the times it helps.
Anyway, I hope you have learned a little bit about me by learning my remedies for bad days. I think the key is not making my brain work and having a little bit of quietness. Going back in life (regression) to a time when all the decisions weren't left up to me and I didn't decide everything. This is another one of those days when I totally believe and LOVE the sovereignty of God!
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
First, my Mom - Dianne, Mother when I'm whining, usually just Mom. My biggest fan, the artist of most of the paintings in my house, and a great cook. Thanks Mom! I love you...
Next, is my mentor mother...Phyllis, Mrs. Billy, She really taught me how to cook, be a Godly woman, love on teenagers, love her husband, have a quiet time - a real one, hospitality to its fullest. Thank you - you are amazing. Her kids, Jill and Jeremy, will definitely rise up and call her blessed. Look forward to seeing you in a few weeks. PTL
Another, Mom #2 as some of us girls call her. Mrs. S, teacher extraordinaire, Mom to 2 grown kids with kids of their own. She believed in my musical ability back when I was a jabbermouth with glasses in the seventh grade. Thank you!
Now are some I know... (I'll miss some, please don't take it personally):
Veronica - the First Mom at the Summit Church - she has the cutest girls - She knows her theology, teaches it to her girls, disciplines her girls, loves her husband, bakes, and most people say way out of her husband's league - but she's great!
Clarissa - she's my deacon's wife at church - much more, she's a great roommate in Thailand and a great eating partner at Elmos. She's got great kids too!
Joy - she's an adoptive Mom, but a Mom none the less. She's a busy mom to a 17 mth old and 2 dogs. Her husband is on faculty at SWBTS and his www is here if you want to see more pictures of Rachel. She's a great friend who has always been able to tell me like it is (even though I don't always listen)...(ah, remember the days)
Laura - MOOOOOO. You can check out her blog here and see her cute baby. We met before she even got to Flagler, lived on the same hall in the dorm, I sang in their wedding, now she's a Mom with lots of creative gifts and is using them.
T - my friend who works overseas. She is the second newest Mom of the bunch...she's gorgeous and loves serving Jesus. Her blog is here and you can see baby J.
Kasey - amazing girl who loves Jesus and her husband and new baby. She did our makeup at her wedding - definitely the most godly wedding I've been to (to date of course).
Patty - my worship pastor's wife from ABC - her girls are equally as cute and she came into motherhood in a most unique birthing place a little bit earlier than expected. I look forward to seeing you in June too (and your girls and husband)
Corinne - Even though I never get to see you...I know you have three precious kids - the first being Genesis - know that you are loved. You guys just need to move further south so we can all see you (I think most of us live in the south...see what you are missing)
Stace - You have perhaps taught me the most out of all the young moms. You and Rick love, nurture, teach, and discipline both Jacob and Noel. Your love for the Word and you being so real with me on struggles and joys. Thank you - your friendship amazes me, even if you do live in SC.
Sandra - You taught me a lot while at seminary, in the office, at Open Door - thank you - about prayer and faith even in times of uncertainty. You have raised two great boys who love you dearly!
Merriem - Oh, the Mom wonder of three boys. Danny wouldn't not survive without you. The decisions that have been made over the past year - you are great! Keep being a Mom for Jesus and a light to all who see you!
Moms listed here...you amaze me. Your patience with your kids overwhelm me. Thank you for your love for Jesus and your kids. It is definitely the most important job in the world IF I EVER have kids - I will use much of what you have taught me to hopefully raise them like you have done your kids. Your kids will rise up and call you blessed and you will train up your children in the way they should go - so they go out into all the world proclaiming the name of Jesus and His glory! Thank you.
Monday, May 08, 2006
Sunday, May 07, 2006
This is my older brother, Alan, and my Uncle Eddie who is the youngest of the four kids. He plays the piano and had brought his keyboard, so we sang hymns all morning and he was jazzing them up. It was fun.
Not many people outside the south know what a smoker is. This is my papa's smoker. They had been out there since 6a firing it up and making good smoked mullet (its a fish they catch down in Ft. Myers). It was so good. I hadn't had any for a long time. The freezer is now empty so my brother will have to go with him to fish again.
This is Uncle Eddie showing me how to "suck an orange". I know, I should have known this before I am almost 30, but I learned today. Take an orange and cut the top off (I used my Dad's pocket knife). Slice down one time only to the white to get the peel off. Then take the point of the knife and dig in to the orange to extract a little of the juice. Then turn it up, squeeze, and suck at the same time. You are your own straw! That is fresh squeezed OJ - none of this "from concentrate" stuff.
Now, I'm chilling at home, most have left. Alan and Ty are coming up next week, but no more family again for a while
Saturday, May 06, 2006
The best bbq! Oh my goodness - none of that vinegar junk they serve in NC - only Sonny's will ever foot the bill!
Thursday, May 04, 2006
This is slightly out of order (from the original lyrics), but look at these:
Friend for life, Who took my pain, the cleansing flood, You remain, wash over me, till I can't be seen.
Sanctification (hear John 3.30 in there)
Living water swallow me
Deepest river wash me clean,
Jesus Savior more of Thee
Come and ruin me with your love - so no other is enough
Come and leave your mark on me
Jesus, more of Thee
Glorification (this is what will be truth when we are in heaven, without sin to entangle us and call us away)
Gloria - glory in the highest
Forever I will hide myself in Thee
Gloria - glory in excelsis deo, gloria, gloria
Every breath that I breathe - every moment in my history
In effort to praise you, in effort to Praise YOU
So, there is truth in music. It just depends on what music you listen to. This has been very telling of some of the stuff I'm learning now and thinking about. I get motivated to do something or get rid of the sin in my life - then it creaps back in - usually around the time I push snooze in the morning. Jesus - take away - swallow me - the pride, the sin, the self. There is a lot of me, I don't want more of me, I just let me down. I want you - more of you - all of you - to come and purify me. As another song of their's says: "Paint me with your purity, that I'd attract your majesty." And perhaps my fave of their's: Captivate - "Captivate us Lord Jesus, set our eyes on You, devestate us, with your presence falling down - holy fountain consume us with you."
What a prayer
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
These are my parents. They were at the Sons of the American Revolution meeting in the holy land of Florida (Gainesville). My Dad is really into genealogy (that is what he does for a living and is really good at it) and my Mom is a Mom and my biggest fan.