Wednesday, May 17, 2006

Defining Christian Hedonism (and the lack thereof)

Ok - has been a dry few weeks for me. Very little time in the Word, reading other books (but nothing compares to the Word), season finales on tv, movies, etc. But...where does my joy come from?
Does it come from losing weight? Hopefully not, although it is a good thing to be healthy and take care of the temple that God has bought!
Does it come from watching TV. I would hope not, but when have I ever been so excited about reading the Word and spend three hours a night reading it - or recording it when I have to miss it and pouring over it -skipping the commercials - when I can watch it?
Does it come from a boring job? Well, definitely not this one. Even getting paid more - it doesn't 40 hours a week is not going to fulfill me - no matter what job I have?
Does it come from my ministry? Well, even though it is the reason I am in the state - it isn't. You would think that - every summer I go through this...why am I here? My ministry pretty much comes to a complete stop for 3 1/2 mths and I wonder what in the world am I doing here?
Does it come from material things? Definitely not - especially when you are still unpacking things from when you moved in (3mths ago).
Does it come from a relationship - any relationship. Nope - my life is pretty slim on those right now, and I actually like it. I let others do the talking and I just sorta listen - and I'm good with it. I hope no one thinks anything bad because I don't talk a lot... Then when it comes to guys...are expectations really that high? Don't lower them - but are they realistic. Don't know...

Where is the truth and desire of Ps 27.4 and Ps 63 in my life these days? Christian Hedonism - John PIper and Jonathan Edwards...finding joy in God because it will bring us the most joy because only God can fulfill all of our everythings with Himself. That is not me right now...

Oh pray that it is: pray the desire returns...

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