Finally got all of my books unpacked yesterday. A friend was over and saw this book by Elisabeth Elliot and said it was really good. I hadn't read it - so I said sure, give me something new to read.
I read the preface last night. That was enough to convict me of some thoughts of entitlement and ungratefulness for even the hard times in my life. As JD preached this past week - we need to be so overwhelmed by God's grace - not by anything else. We should be astounded that we got grace and His goodness - not His wrath which we deserve.
So often in life I think I should be entitled to something: but I am not entitled to anything except an eternity in hell. But, apart from the salvific meaning of this...I think I'm entitled to a lot of things in life - then when others get something that I don't, I often don't like that. Not at all. But, why should I even get them...
Does the Bible really say - Kim, you will be married? No it doesn't? So, why do I dislike it sometimes (however brief or long) when others get marriage and I don't? Am I more deserving than they are - no, we both don't deserve it - it is just a means of sanctification that some people get and some people don't - all in God's perfect plan.
This is from the Preface to her book: (from a time in her life from the 50s)
"Nearly every time I have told it and tried to explain what I think God wanted to teach me in it of absolute commitment and trust, someone has asked, 'but why did God let it happen?' Someday they and I will be satisfied with His answer. Of one thing I am perfectly sure: God's story never ends with ashes."
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4 comments:
I stumbled upon your blog and just wanted to say that I have a problem with entitlement as well. I'm married and am still considered a newlywed, yet I'm 28 going on 29 and desperately want to be at the point in my life where I can have a baby. But I'm not there yet and lots of my friends and family members are already on their second child by now. I've been working really hard to not blame God that I'm not at that place yet. But it's difficult, so I understand where you're coming from. I think it's our human, sinful nature to compare ourselves with others. So tough.
What is the name of this book? I've been hearing of Elisabeth Elliot lately but I have never read anything from her.
Oh, and I think I have my blog address hidden in my profile, so if you're interested, you can go to http://webgal79.blogspot.com to read mine. I'm another Christian just trying to make it in this crazy world...
The book is These Strange Ashes - it is about her first year as a missionary, before she was married to Jim Elliot
Thank you! I figured it out after I read the title of your post. Duh. I'll have to check it out.
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